I was talking with a fellow artist friend today, I guess that is what we can call ourselves. She is the kind of artist that paints and I am the kind that uses a camera. She was painting a cute medallion sort of thing over my daughter’s bed. My mom was over here also and said, “you have to have a lot of confidence to paint directly on someone’s wall” and that got me thinking. So I asked Susan if she feels like she is good at what she does, hoping she feels the way I do.
Art is so tricky, it is so subjective. Some people may love a photograph I take and other’s may think it’s the crappiest picture they’ve seen. It takes a while to find your certain style and to produce a consistent body of work that follows that style that is all your own.
So back to the confidence. I sometimes feel like I suck. I wonder who in their right mind would pay me to take pictures for them. I don’t feel very creative and I don’t feel like I know everything about photography. And then sometimes I feel like I should raise my prices and win competitions. Mostly I feel somewhere in between. It’s hard to remain confident all the time and there is always more to learn and always someone that is better than you. Way better. It’s cool to be able to look back at how far my work has come. And honestly, my clients are just looking for that precious image of their child or family that is going to freeze time and become a priceless memory, I don’t think they necessarily care if the bokeh was exactly how I envisioned it, or if I forgot to clone out a dead spot in the grass. It’s a beautiful gift to give someone and my client’s happiness is contagious and gives that boost that I need to make it the next level. I can’t even tell you how happy it makes me to see words like amazing, gorgeous and priceless commented under my shots on facebook.
I like to get on my favorite photographer’s blogs and look back at their early work and see where they started. It makes me feel so much better to see that not even Keri Meyers and Andee Tate started out as badasses. We all grow as artists all the time, so it’s important to remind yourself that even the greats started out at the same somewhere we all started out at. So let’s go on a stroll down my favorite lane.
My first photography gig, I believe it was unpaid.
One of my first family sessions
One of my first newborn sessions, which I now specialize in.
One of my first 6(ish) month sessions.
The funny part is that in probably a year or two I will look back on my current work with a critical eye. But for now I am happy and love the work I produce. Most days 😉 And that does not mean that I think I have made it or get to just coast on cruise control for a while. Oh no. In fact, I am heading out to an intense newborn workshop in November with Laura Brett and absolutely can not wait!
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